In today’s world, we are bombarded with images of perfection reflecting on the shiny coated screens that display what society deems as the picture of perfection. The images of beauty flash before our eyes, giving us a definition of worth and what is acceptable in our world. We are given a cookie-cutout vision of what we are to mold ourselves into if we are to become anything valuable to anyone.
At every turn, we find ourselves being told how to be, what to think, what to like, and how to fit in. We feel the discomfort as we conform to become what is expected of us. We feel this misalignment deep inside ourselves and often miss the voice of pleading to us from within our inner depths, a voice that speaks of our truest desires, our dreams, and our aspirations. We know deep down inside, in those quiet moments in our lives, when we have time to reflect, that something feels amiss.
We define our own lives; it is not supposed to be the other way around. Look in the mirror. What do you see? We are often our own worst persecutors, waiting at every second to undermine, insult, and belittle our own efforts. Think about the last time you paid yourself a compliment. At times, that’s very seldom, if not at all. Most of the time we find ourselves looking at that mirror and saying things like, “I wish I had…, I wish I was…, I wish I wasn’t…” instead of, “I’m so glad I am…, I know I am…, I love who I am…” Even those who appear to be the most confident have their moments of insecurity and question their self-worth. Some mask their feelings with service, some with bitterness, some with a smile, and some with tears and seclusion. We all fight the same battles day after day. Some of us keep our emotions at bay, and some of us tell the world how we feel, hoping someone will reach out to help us.
We wait in hopes for others to tell us that we are worth something when we can’t even say it about ourselves. We wait for others to validate us, applaud our efforts, and give us that gold star that says, “You did it, now you have arrived, and I accept you as worthy.” We transfer our power to someone else to fulfill our needs; that intimate part in us that is so gentle, sensitive, and special. We aren’t told when we are young as children that the power has always been with us. We aren’t told there’s only one person in this life who can fulfill that void of self-acceptance that we all desire.
There is ONE who has been there with you the whole time, walking with you, talking with you, lying dormant, waiting for you to acknowledge their presence. This person is there when you cry, when you smile, when you are angry, when you are afraid, when you are lost, and when you are dreaming. It waits as you lie in slumber until you awaken to realize how magnificent you truly are. It waits for you to see that it has always been there to greet you with welcoming arms, with no judgment, with love, and to understand you like no other. It is the moment of utter quiet when you are with your Self.
You are always with your Self. “Your” being you, and “self” that other voice inside you; the voice from your heart like two intertwined to make one whole being. That is a part of you that will never leave you. We often think we are alone if not in the presence of another. Yet we don’t realize that we always have someone with us. Take note of all the times you have been “alone.” When you were thinking about something that happened throughout the day, or perhaps were upset about an event that took place that day, who did you converse with at that moment when you were alone? Who heard your every complaint, concern, and even your dorky joke and still laughed at it? YOU!
We as human beings have the capacity and gift to sit alone, by ourselves, to reflect and have a complete conversation by ourselves, laugh at our own thoughts, ask ourselves questions and answer them, tell ourselves a story and marvel at the joy it brings to our hearts from just our imagination. And let’s not forget the musician who can write a song all by themselves and with the strum of the guitar, feel the melody in their soul speaking to them and bringing them joy. And how about the artist, who sees the heavens in his mind and with the stroke of the brush he paints a picture for others to look upon, to have a piece of that heaven that was first given to him from himself to the canvas in front of him. It is in the words written by the author that comes alive as the voice within speaks to them that creates a beautiful story that then paints the picture in another’s mind to enjoy but not before the author themselves gets to see the story first. Did any one of these people need anyone else outside of themselves to feel at peace, at joy, to be happy, and be fulfilled?
Ask yourself this question: If you saw a little boy or girl get bullied in the street, would you stand there and allow it to happen? Would it make you angry and think of it as an injustice that this innocent and perfect child was being tormented and did not deserve it? Would you want to rush over to this little one and be their defender?
Let’s go back to the mirror, now see yourself looking at yourself as that person watching the child who was bullied. As you watch yourself from afar, seeing you telling yourself at that mirror “I wish I had…, I wish I was…, I wish I wasn’t…” When will you rush over and defend that innocent and perfect you that continues to allow the world to bully them with their imposing opinions, distorted definitions of what they should mold themselves to be acceptable in their eyes? When did you decide that those words filled with poison had any importance and were ok in your life? What is so different from the bully that belittles a child, to the bully we meet at the mirror that listens to the voices of the outside world defining your existence and value? We are each beautifully flawed; that is what makes us perfect. Each of us in our own unique inner world carries wondrous amounts of talent, depth, magic, that no other carries like unto it. We will each touch the lives of another in our own way and leave a mark that makes a difference in someone’s world, even though you might not know it.
Don’t let the world be that bully. Don’t let it become a part of you and drown out the peaceful voice that is within you, that cheers you on, that has been and is still waiting to be heard by you right now.
